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Pulpy dreams and strange stories..

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Pulp has infiltrated my senses!

I had a dream where I was at a Pulp concert (at a school or something) and Jarvis was wearing pink pyjamas and they played a song that sounded like a cross between "I Got You Babe" & "Scarborough Fair"....very strange!

In another strange pulpy dream of mine I was at some record store and I saw copies of all the Pulp videos for like $5 so I bought them all only to find out when I got home that someone had taped Geraldo over them!!

I had a very strange dream where I was at a festival of sorts and Pulp were playing but for some reason Jarvis was wearing a cave-man outfit!! A black tee-shirt with a leopard-skin toga over it! (I think) And his glasses were like coke bottle bottoms---the big ones. They were really thick. 

Another Pulp-related dream of mine started off with a person going through a drive-thru and then it kind of zoomed in on the tire which had a Pulp hubcap but it went around the inner outside edge of the tire and it had the Different Class-era logo on it that was raised and would leave an imprint where you drove it [more like a giant stamp then, really..] Then there was something about a subway station and a chip bag full of shrimp and mouses' tails [!] and all I can remember after that is that Russell was there and Jarvis was wearing a weird patchwork shirt and was talking on the phone.. [which may have been my subconscious remembering that picture of Pulp in an office where Jarvis was on the phone..]
 
One of my most Freudian dreams started off in a large room where Pulp were lounging around. For some reason I was there.. I remember I was talking to Jarvis, who was drinking whiskey, and all of a sudden he dipped his fingers into his whiskey and offered them to me to lick the whiskey off! Don't even start interpretating that for me.
 

Ian Clark's Pulp dream:

"[OK, this is f###ing strange]
Pulp were playing at Blackpool Winter Gardens, living a 20 minute drive away - I went. Everyone from the Bar Italia message board was there except PQ and Steve. They played some songs. Somehow I found myself going to the entrance, someone was there who said 'Go to the Town Centre' so I did. My car had been driven up to the part where you can't drive, just walk.. by PQ, with Steve sat in the back. PQ moved to the passenger seat then I got in and drove off onto the prom.. [I have no idea that the prom is. - Canadian editor] Then onto the main road into Preston [God only knows how I managed that one because on the prom I was heading north!!] at 60 mph.. Then I woke up.

[You're right Ian, that was a strange one! -Ed.]

and it doesn't end there.... 

One day when I was showing my friend a picture of Jarvis (in that purple shiny shirt..) a guy I know looked at it and said "Hey- it's Matthew Good!" (crap canadian singer in crap band)...then later (knowing it wasn't Mr.Good) he asked "Isn't he the guy that molested some children?"
good grief!! 

One day, someone I knew back in high school wrote a list of people who would be invited to an after-party (after my high school's formal). My friend Shirley and I started throwing out names of celebrities to invite...Jesus (we all agreed he'd be a downer), Andy Warhol and the like...and I (of course) said "Jarvis Cocker!". So- she proceeded to write his name down. I then grabbed the paper to look at the list and found 'Jarvice Cockery' there instead... Later on, me & Shirley started contemplating this alter-ego.. We said how 'Jarvice Cockery' (very french, isn't it?) would be Jarvis' unfashionable evil twin, donning track pants and "I'm With Stupid" tee-shirts. Oh the trouble he'd cause! Playing tricks on Jacko (like hiring kiddies to file lawsuits..), going to Boyzone and S-Club-7 concerts and all sorts of crazy stuff! (just call him "The Jarv That Never Happened")

ahh yes--didn't you just love that lil' anecdote? And just think--you'll never get the time you took to read it back!